The MISSING Link

“Humans are actually hybrids, who emerged as an offspring of a male pig and a female chimpanzee.”

Dr Eugene McCarthy — one of the world's leading authorities on hybridization in animals from the University of Georgia has suggested that humans didn't evolve from just apes but was a backcross hybrid of a chimpanzee and pigs.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Well, it does explain how the sacred trait of “chauvinistic piggyism” is successfully carried by the male human; however, it does raise some pertinent {Come on, do I appear to be so unimaginative to discuss the rather gross genital disharmony (wrt a sperm loitering down a downright hostile alien canal to woo a non-cooperative native egg) and gamete incompatibility here} logistical issues.

Although it’s rare, but an occasional “inspired” monkey is known to come down from his arboreal loft to bugger an unsuspecting goat, but question is -- how exactly does a female chimpanzee entice a sadomasochistic boar?

By nature, pigs look down on everything (remember the wrinkled nose?), they are built (aerodynamics,:-) necessity and intention –wise) to never look up (Babe was an exception (alright!), and a confused pig by all means, and exceptions do not disprove a rule—they rather improve it). So a male pig stalking a female Chimp is quite out of the question. Alternatively, a female Chimp trying to lure a male Boar would only invite prompt DBE, i.e death by evisceration (read Inferno by Dante Alighieri for detail). Therefore, although a male chimp getting the better of a female pig from behind is plausible, the odd to the opposite scenario has to be one in a phenomenallion.

Based on this elementary difficulty, it appears that a “missing link” is literally missing here, despite the prejudiced lot of evolutionary biologists’ apathy to the poor term.

I believe, we are looking at the possible existence of quite a potent mediator at the scene, a PIMP to be exact. And when we talk about a missing PIMP, Watson, anyone could be a suspect—so who the devil was it?  A “Pushy chIMP”, or a “Palatability Interfering Malicious Potato”—that is the question.